I was talking to a customer the other day about an issue that needs to be resolved, yet I can do nothing about except wait for all parties to do their jobs. After I thanked him for his patience, he said, "there's no use for me to get angry. It doesn't help the problem get solved and it [makes you mad] so you don't want to talk to me." This coming from a man who is in all probability an unbeliever. What a rebuke!
Just this week I found myself upset because our van is having major issues--a burned out transmission started it all, but in the process, the mechanic found about 4 other issues that need to be fixed and we are probably going to end up spending as much for repairs as we did to buy the van in the first place. Honestly, frustration is building. House repairs may quite possibly be at a standstill until more resources become available due to this unexpected expense. Timeline for move-in? unknown.
There is a war going on in my heart. Questions about provisions, about what our needs really are, about why, about how, about when. And then, Scripture floods my mind, and the war is on.
If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him! (matt 7:11)
Since when do I get to know why God is doing what He is doing? It really doesn't matter if I know why or when or how. God loves me, and I know that He will always do what is best. God who cannot lie promises to meet my needs. He has proven time and again what a faithful provider He is.
I have forgotten
-the greatest gift of all, salvation! All "needs" pale in comparisson to this one, met by God's grace
-friends and family to encourage me spiritually
-medical bills, paid in full (two hospital visits with no insurance)
-the time mom & I prayed for new upstairs carpet without telling anyone else and God provided us with FREE carpet! (and why was I shocked)
-the FREE cars we got growing up (at least 2, I lost count)
-checks in the mail, or slipped to us at church when "no one" knew we needed money
-graduating with no college debt
-a place to live for two years plus, virtually rent-free
-free furniture, over and over
-wonderful jobs for both of us, health insurance
and MORE provisions, too numerous to count.
Blessed be the Lord, who daily bears us up; God is our salvation. (ps 69:11)