Today, no one in my family passed away.
No one was seriously injured.
No one had to have chemotherapy, kidney dialysis, or a transplant.
No one received a difficult diagnosis.
We are able to pay our bills this month; Michael has a job.
There is food in our refrigerator, pantry, deep freezer.
We have a beautiful home to live in.
I am in love with my husband, and he loves me.
I have two gorgeous, bright, curious children.
We are not oppressed, abused, or threatened for our faith.
We have freedom to live, to love, to worship.
There is much to be thankful for.
But it was still a hard day for me.
And it's okay for me to struggle with that. It's okay for my small trials to remind me of God's Big Grace. It's okay for me to fail and get back up, and it's okay to revel in God's love for me in spite of my failures. It's okay for me to admit that I am blessed and that I still struggle. I know I am not alone. I know I am human.
God is so good to me, so beyond words. Sometimes I taste His goodness in the form of blessings and selfishly want more sunshine, more happiness, more ease. Instead, I pray that no matter how my day goes, or what small or large trial comes my way, I would truly desire God's glory above my comfort. I've been singing this song today.
AS LONG AS YOU ARE GLORIFIED
Words and Music byMark Altrogge
Shall I take from Your hand Your blessings
Yet not welcome any pain
Shall I thank You for days of sunshine
Yet grumble in days of rain
Shall I love You in times of plenty
Then leave You in days of drought
Shall I trust when I reap a harvest
But when winter winds blow, then doubt
Oh let Your will be done in me
In Your love I will abide
Oh I long for nothing else as long
As You are glorified
Are You good only when I prosper
And true only when I’m filled
Are You King only when I’m carefree
And God only when I’m well
You are good when I’m poor and needy
You are true when I’m parched and dry
You still reign in the deepest valley
You’re still God in the darkest night