Tuesday, November 15


People keep asking me how we're adjusting, and let me tell you, my answer is this:

Better than I expected!

Cadence is a super relaxed baby. She sleeps a lot during the day still - and when she's not sleeping, she is very happy to hang out in her swing, kick her legs around while lying on the floor, work on her rolling over skills, and smile at anyone who is within her sight. She's really really awesome. It helps that she has two brothers who adore her, of course.

When we had Aaron, I thought he was pretty laid back, a good baby.

Then Evan came and I thought, "wow, good thing Aaron came first!" Evan was a dream baby who blew away my concept of laid back.

Now Cadence! WOW! Am I ever blessed.

On the other hand, we still have rough days - take yesterday, for example. A mess up at the bank (their fault), followed by a 3-kid trip to Meijer (which went very well!) followed by a miserable loading-of-the-van experience in the parking lot and some cutting words from a no-doubt-well-meaning stranger. Then we had a whine-all-the-way home trip, which wore the nerves right out of me. Cadence was crying at that point because she'd been awake for an hour with no food. When we finally made it into our house, I had a screaming hungry baby, and whining, complaining, temper-tantrum throwing children screaming their lunchtime demands at their mother. Top this off with an entire collection of family toothbrushes shoved down the sink drain by a curious three year old?

When I opened my mouth to respond, it was not my finest moment. Not by a long shot.

So when I caught a whiff of this article on a friend's facebook page during (attempted) nap time, I read it eagerly. Some very good reminders, some interesting thoughts, and you know what? I am so SO glad that I have God to help me through those rough days. I'm sure he used that friend's timely post to help give me some extra coping tools.

In the midst of it, of course, all I could think about was throwing in the towel, calling Michael and telling him the kids would be listed on Craigslist when he got home. (I jest. Maybe.) But I do have an anchor, a rock, and even though at the end of yesterday I was D.O.N.E., God quietly reminded me of His mercies, new every morning, and His grace, sufficient for each day. His grace, extended in forgiveness when I fail. Miserably.

Today has been infinitely better. I'm so glad bad days are most often followed by good. I am so glad I have a Savior, a shelter, and a God who cares about me, my small children, and our terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad days.


melinda said...

Glad to know I'm not the only one. I understand that I just have one, but today I was ready to QUIT. I almost called my husband and said that I quit being a mother. Now he is FINALLY sleeping. I was thinking today how thankful I am that God does not treat us like I treat Caleb (lack of patience, ect)

Mary Ann said...

I'm sorry you had a bad day but God is good to use those days to give us perspective & help us rely on Him. Personally I know I'd be running all over the place in my own strength if God didn't push my limits. I'm so grateful the Lord gave you those three little ones & I'm sure He will equip you for the task :-)

Alicia said...

Oh dear, been THERE! You are not alone! I don't know if that softens the feelings of failure or not but it sure helps me when I feel like an utter wretch of a mother for my lack of patience and mercy towards these blessed kiddos!

Praying you get a good's night rest and a renewal of peace from God's Word!